Have you ever been guilty of looking at others your own age and thinking: Surely I can't look that old? Well … you'll love this one!

My name is Alice, and I was sitting in the waiting room for my first appointment with a new dentist. I noticed his DDS diploma on the wall, which bore his full name. Suddenly, I remembered a tall, handsome, dark-haired boy with the same name had been in my high school class some 30-odd years ago.

Could he be the same guy that I had a secret crush on, way back then? Upon seeing him, however, I quickly discarded any such thought. This balding, gray-haired man with the deeply lined face was way too old to have been my classmate!

After he examined my teeth, I asked him if he had attended Morgan Park High School. “Yes. Yes, I did. I”m a Mustang,” he gleamed with pride.

"When did you graduate?” I asked.

He answered, “In 1975. Why do you ask?”

“You were in my class,” I exclaimed!

He looked at me closely. Then, that ugly, old, bald, wrinkle-faced, fat-assed, gray-haired, decrepit s.o.b. asked, “What did you teach?”

(Note to self - don't upset Alice!! )